


On Your Side

by ladymac111



Series: all the things that we could do [1]
Category: Voltron: Legendary Defender
Genre: F/M, Fandom Trumps Hate, POV First Person, POV Hunk (Voltron), Pining, Pre-Slash, Present Tense, protective!Hunk, warning for threatened sexual violence
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-06-23
Updated: 2018-06-23
Packaged: 2019-05-27 03:39:19
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,585
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/15015857
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/ladymac111/pseuds/ladymac111
Summary: When alien visitors give Hunk seriously bad vibes, he struggles to balance his urge to be protective of Pidge with her desire to handle things on her own.





	On Your Side

**Author's Note:**

> This is for Panaili, who won my auction for Fandom Trumps Hate! Thank you so much for your contribution to Life After Hate, which is making a difference in my own back yard.
> 
> The story takes place vaguely before the squad teams up with Lotor. I got kind of personal here and projected my #metoo onto Pidge; it doesn’t go far but it’s a bit distressing so consider yourself warned for off-screen threats of sexual violence. I feel that in the current political climate, it's vital to continue having conversations about this.
> 
> Title and opening lyric from "On Your Side" by the Veronicas

_With your hands on my face said, it don't matter, babe_  
_'Cause I'm always on your side_  
_Life isn't pretty, we all get a little wrecked sometimes_  
_..._  
_Through all the hard times, I'm on your side_  
  


I have a bad feeling about the Pendari.

I don’t know why, they haven’t really done anything to warrant it.  But I’ve always been kind of on a hair trigger with this particular anxiety thing, and since I now have something of a reputation of _being right about this shit_ it’s only stronger when it happens.

Well, I say _reputation_ , but nobody else really pays attention to it.  To me, when I voice my concerns. Probably because I can never point to the actual things that are setting me on edge, not until after those things have gone completely sideways.

It’s frustrating.  So I bite my tongue when Allura announces that we’ll be hosting a small contingent of Pendari on the castle ship for a few days, easing their transition from Galra occupation to membership in the Coalition.  Which is something that we do with some regularity, and it’s usually fine, but something about these guys is setting off alarms in my head and I can’t put my finger on _why_.

To be fair, it’s not all of them I’m worried about.  The prime minister and the ambassador seem like the kind of alien leaders we have all the time, people who are genuinely concerned about giving back to the Coalition and striking further blows against the Galra Empire.  The problem is the crown prince and his … cousin, I think? I don’t remember the exact relationship between them, but he’s some kind of royal. And the two of them are really rubbing me the wrong way, they’re exactly like those entitled douchebags we get back on Earth who expect everyone and everything to bend over backwards to accommodate their whims.  From the little social thing we had when they arrived, I gathered that they hadn’t been particularly bothered by the Galra occupation: the royals had been kept with all their usual standards of finery, and these two are the sort of assholes who literally don’t care about how anyone else is faring as long as their luxuries are still there. Also they didn’t even try my canapes.

I can’t imagine why they brought them along.  Maybe the PM is sort of trying to train up the crown prince for diplomacy?  I don’t remember, I spent the whole hour we were with them feeling distinctly uncomfortable about the whole thing so I don’t recall that much.

But the thing that’s _really_ got me uneasy was the interest the prince and his buddy took in Pidge.  They were interested in Allura first, of course -- everyone is interested in Allura.  But I got the sense that they were put off by the fact that Coran and Shiro are always at her elbows.  Nobody gets an in with the Princess unless she wants it.

Pidge, on the other hand, is more of a loner.  I mean, not really a _loner_ , but she likes to spend time by herself, she’s not constantly surrounded by other people, which makes her an easier target.  She was friendly enough at the thing, but she excused herself before I did because she’d had enough of being social, and when she left alone the prince made this _face_ at his friend, and I got a sick feeling in the pit of my stomach.

I think she’s in danger.

I don’t know how much trouble our guests can really get up to while they’re here, but I’m worried they’re out to push some boundaries, and I can tell with horrible certainty that the boundaries they’ve decided to push are Pidge’s.

The thing is, though, Pidge doesn't need me to be her white knight or anything, she's her own protector.  She's perfectly capable and if I did try to defend her, she probably wouldn't like me butting in. She’s a grown-ass woman, she’s not a kid anymore like we all were when this whole thing started, and she’s honestly even more of a fighter than I am.

On the other hand, I’m constitutionally incapable of leaving well enough alone.  Especially when it comes to her.

I track her down close to dinner time, which isn’t that unusual, we do hang out a lot.  She’s in the little electronics lab, alone and deeply engaged in some sort of project. She doesn’t even look up when I come in.

I tap on a desk as I approach her.  “Hey.”

She blinks up at me with a start.  “Oh! Hi, Hunk. Sorry, how long have you…?”

“Just got here,” I reassure her.  “I was just … um.” I swallow and try to sort of fold myself up, leaning on the desk.  “Just checking on you.”

She gives me a little smirk before she returns her attention to her project.  “Not that I’m not glad to see you, but since when do I need checking on?”

She must not have noticed the prince and his cousin.  “Maybe I’m being paranoid.”

“It’s been known to happen.”

She’s really not taking me seriously.  Then again, maybe it’s better if she doesn’t change her behavior and invite even more of their attention.  Or something. At this point I know I’m not exactly thinking straight; it’s always a struggle for me when it comes to Pidge.

I don’t have a response to her little roast, so I just watch her work for a minute.

God, I wish … I wish a lot of things.  I wish I could put voice to all the thoughts in my heart that start thrashing around whenever I’m near Pidge, the ones that constantly want to tell her how spectacular and marvelous she is.  But I also wish that she could just _know,_ so I don’t have to go through the awkwardness.  I wish I could be cool for her, super-capable and stuff, and sometimes I am but the rest of me is always there too, being shy and anxious and over-sharing.

I wish I didn’t have this crush.  I wish we could just be best friends.  I won’t wish she wasn’t special to me, because I will literally kill on that count, but I wish she didn’t get me _twitterpated_.  It’s undignified.

On the other hand, I’m not sure if she’s noticed.  I haven’t been like this all along, it’s come over me gradually, but her behavior towards me hasn’t changed.  Which is good, because I’d hate to force this on her. As much as I desperately want her to know, I refuse to go and change our friendship over something that’s a personal problem.

“So, these visitors,” I say, trying to remember why I came in here.

She groans.  “You mean prince what’s-his-name and the douchebag?  Gag me with a spoon.”

I can’t help laughing, and the levity is as unexpected as it is welcome.  I find myself relaxing as Pidge glances up at me with a grin. “Yeah, those assholes.”

“What about them?”

“They gave me the heebie-jeebies.”  How much do I really want to tell her?  “I didn’t like the way they were looking at you.”

She frowns, and then actually takes her focus off her project.  “They were _looking_ at me?”

“Yeah.  It kind of … it seemed like they were _interested_ in Allura at first, until they saw that Shiro and Coran weren’t going to let her be alone.  And then they started looking at you the same way.”

Her eyebrows jump up into her fringe.  “Looking at _me_?”

I nod, and my mouth is dry.  “Definitely.”

She looks uneasy now.  “Why would -- I’m nothing like Allura.”

“With people like this, I don’t think that’s the point.”

She frowns even harder, but then shakes her head and looks back at her project, though I can tell she’s not really focused on it.  “They’re just dickbags who think they’ve got something over me because I’m a girl. They’re probably too chickenshit to do anything but posture.  It’s just a pissing contest.”

I’m not comfortable with her analysis of it being _just_ anything, but she seems to have closed the discussion.  I heave a sigh, but I try not to be too obvious that I’m doing it.  “Okay. But, like, let me know if you want me to hang out with you while they’re around.  Just to be another person there.”

She glances up with a little smile.  “Thanks, but I don’t think I’ll need a chaperone.”

Her tone is genuine, but it still feels like she’s teasing me, and it stings a little.   _Nobody ever pays attention to me when I’m worried_.  I try to smile, but I fear it’s more like a grimace.  She’s not looking anymore, anyway. “Okay.”

And then I guess all I can do is leave her be.

 

We’ve got another thing with the Pendari in the morning.  It’s the really heavy diplomatic stuff now, the kind of thing where Allura really shines and Coran and Shiro are at her elbows with facts and figures whenever she turns to one of them.  The Pendari PM and ambassador quickly get as engrossed in this as she is, leaving the rest of us feeling out of our depth.

So we peel off one by one.  Lance goes first, and as soon as he’s out the door Pidge gets restless.  She gives me a look -- one that I seem to be unable to read right now, frustratingly -- and a minute later she slips away too.

And now the prince and his buddy are giving each other looks, having a whole silent conversation, and the anxiety in the pit of my stomach knows that it’s not about politics.  I manage to hold out for about five minutes before I can’t take it any more, and I give Shiro a little nod as I silently excuse myself from the negotiations.

When I’m out in the hall, my heart is pounding.   _Why am I so nervous?_ They’re not with Pidge right now, they don’t even know where she is -- _I_ don’t even know where she is.  I’ve got a pretty good guess, and I really want to go running to her.  But her words from yesterday are stuck in my mind, a horrible, echoing loop of them: “ _I don’t need a chaperone._ ”

She doesn’t need me.  She doesn’t _want_ me.  Not as a protector, not right now, she’s going to handle it herself.  God, what _it?_  Nothing is even happening.  I’m freaking the fuck out and nothing is even going on!

I lean against the wall and force myself to inhale deeply.  And again. And again.

Right.  Okay.

Pidge is fine.  She’s safe. Even if that bag of rancid dicks tries something, she’s safe because she’s a fighter.  She’ll be fine.

I don’t actually believe it, but telling it to myself helps unspool my panic from a thunderstorm down to a drip.

I start walking, just anywhere; I left the negotiation but there’s not really anything else on my mind, I just couldn’t be in there while Pidge wasn’t.

I feel like maybe I should go to the training deck and work out, get out some of this nervous energy by doing something that’s good for me.  But the training deck is pretty far from the green lion’s hangar, and even though Pidge doesn’t need me ( _doesn’t want me_ ) I have to be nearby.

Jesus, when did I become so overbearing?  So controlling? Just because I have a mega crush on a girl doesn’t _mean_ anything, it shouldn’t change our relationship.

Is this a change, though?  I catch myself and my footsteps hesitate.  Being protective is kind of my _thing_ , right?  I’m the yellow paladin, support and strength and whatever.  We’re all about protecting, and I’m the tank of the protectors.  I’ve been like this a lot of times in battle.

Why does it feel different now?  Why does it feel personal?

I know perfectly well _why_ , but even still I can’t even say it inside my head.  It’s my emotions getting the better of me. _Again._

I start walking again, a little more briskly.  Maybe if I keep moving, these thoughts and feelings can just spin around inside me until they dissipate.  Like a typhoon that hits land, they’ll knock some things over but then run out of juice.

After a while I do feel calmer, and I finally look at my surroundings.  The hallways in the ship are all so similar, but after the years out here I’m learning the subtleties.  Plus it helps that I’m recognizing certain signs, even though I still can’t read Altean -- I’m right outside the kitchen.

Normally after an emotional typhoon like this I’d indulge in some comfort eating, but the restlessness in my belly is telling me that the typhoon isn’t really over yet.  I’m calmer, but I’m still uncomfortable, still upset, though at this point I’m starting to see that I’m upset about Pidge’s rejection in addition to my discomfort about the Pendari.  I wouldn’t say I’m _equally_ upset, but I should stop trying to deny it.

I really like Pidge.  I _really_ like her.  She’s the best friend I’ve ever had, and she’s so clever and creative, and sassy and funny and just always on my wavelength.  When she gets ahead of me she doesn’t stop until I catch up, but I always catch her up anyway and she’s still going but I somehow haven’t missed anything.  I don’t know how she does it.

She’s remarkable.

I have it _bad._

I realize I’m not actually upset any more about her rejecting my offer of protection.  Of course she would, she’s Pidge, this is clearly how she does things. It’s not that she doesn’t believe me, or doesn’t respect the fact that I’m nervous -- it’s just that she does things _her way._  And most of the time, her way is fantastic.

But _god,_ those two guys.  They’re absolutely up to no good.

So I make a decision: I know what Pidge wants from me, but I need to check in on her.  I’m not sure how long I’ve been walking around but I can’t imagine the prince and his buddy are still in the meeting, and I’m hoping that maybe if I’m hanging with Pidge when they find her, they’ll decide it’s not worth it and just leave her alone.  Even if she’ll be upset with me for being over-protective, I’d rather that happens then leave her to face them alone.

I’m still in my paladin armor though, and it’s the appropriate level of formal for diplomatic meetings, but not quite comfortable for watching Pidge work, especially if I’m pretending I’m not there to run interference on alien fuckboy shenanigans.  So I turn around and head back to my room to change before I make my way down to the green lion’s hangar.

But as I get close, I hear voices coming from the hangar, and my heart leaps up into my throat.  I’m still too far to tell who it is, but it’s clear that Pidge isn’t alone.

I hold myself back from running; I’d look like an idiot if I burst in all panicked and it was Lance.  And the voices aren’t raised or anything, just normal speaking volume. If there was trouble Pidge would be making noise about it, I know that much about her.

I hear Pidge’s voice then, and I can’t understand what she’s saying but I know it’s her, and … something sounds off.  There’s some kind of tone to her voice that makes me _very_ nervous, she sounds defensive, or annoyed, but not in a playful way, in a serious way.  I walk a little faster, but I’m careful to keep my footsteps as quiet as possible; if it _is_ them, I don’t want them to be alerted to my presence.

“What?” Pidge says.  “No, it has nothing to do with that.”

A deeper voice speaks, but I still can’t make out the words.

“I think I know how my own tech works.”  She really doesn’t sound right.

“Ah, take it easy,” the other voice says, and I’m convinced now that it’s the prince.  “I didn’t mean anything by it.”

“He didn’t mean anything by it,” says another voice -- the cousin or whoever he is.  He sounds absolutely menacing.

I’m almost at the door to the hangar; it’s open, but from this angle I can’t see anything.  I press myself up against the wall and inch closer.

“Woah!  Hey!” Pidge says, and her voice is shrill, and then there’s a little metallic clatter, like something was knocked over.  “What are you doing?”

“It’s fine,” says the prince, and his voice is deep and growly -- it’s the most threatening sound I’ve ever heard in my life.

“Hey!” Pidge shouts again, and she sounds like she’s panicking, and that’s all I can take.

“What’s going on?!”

I burst into the hangar just in time to see the cousin stumble away from Pidge, his hand on his solar plexus and a look of pained surprise on his face.  The prince has his back to me, and he’s right in front of Pidge but whips around when he hears me. She takes advantage of the surprise to put her full weight on the desk behind her and give him a solid kick with both feet, right to his hips, that sends him stumbling.

“What the hell?” the cousin says, and they both look furious, but they’re not doing anything now besides slowly backing away from Pidge.

“You both need to leave,” I say, and my voice is shaking so badly I feel like I can barely breathe.  I try to inject as much authority into it as I possibly can. “Get out of here. Now.”

I focus on Pidge: she’s breathing hard, and her eyes are wide, her mouth hanging open, her expression just this side of panic.  She watches me as I cross the room, neither of us giving any attention to the two visitors, who scurry out the door.

I can tell when they’ve left because Pidge suddenly un-freezes and throws herself at me.

“I’ve got you,” I gasp, and she’s trembling, clutching the back of my shirt so tightly that her knuckles are actually digging into my flesh.  “I’ve got you, it’s okay.”

Her face is pressed into my chest, and she sucks in a deep breath, blows it out hard, sucks in another.  I smooth my hands over her back, both of them flat against her, hoping that my touch is enough for her to feel protected, to feel safe.

After a while, she picks her head up just a little and swallows hard.  “They--”

But her voice catches, she can’t finish her thought.

“I know.”

She makes a little sound of distress, pressing into my chest again.  “They were going to.”

“I know.”  I tighten my arms around her, just a little.  “I know, but it’s okay now.”

“I’m so glad you’re here,” she breathes.

“Me too.”  I’m still trying to come down from that horrible fear.  “I think I was just in time.”

She doesn’t answer, but she nods.

We stand there for what feels like a long time.  Having her here, knowing she’s safe, I’m able to come down from my anxiety and feel solid, feel like a good protector.  I’ve never let myself really feel like this before. But I’ve also never had to protect someone I loved in a situation like this.

It’s weird, really.  For some reason, this feels very different than the past years of universe defending.  And it’s not like it’s even the first time I’ve protected Pidge from something, it’s just the first time she’s been vulnerable to something _like this._

But _god_ , it’s awful.  I’m filled with regret that I didn’t get here sooner, alongside my gratitude that I arrived when I did.  This shouldn’t have happened to her at all. But even so … was it my call to make?

I don’t know.  All I know is I’m here now.

The computer console pings, and I look up to see Allura’s face.  “Pidge, are you there?”

Pidge pries her face up from my chest, and she turns to the computer.  “Yeah, I’m here.”

My heart breaks; she sounds wrecked, and I see her wipe her face with her wrist.  Has she been crying?

“Are you all right?” Allura says, and her concern is obvious.

Pidge nods.  “I’m okay. Hunk is here.”

I wave at the princess, who nods, looking serious.  “Will you both please come to the conference room? Our guests have left.”

Which is unexpected: they were supposed to stay with us until tomorrow.  “They’ve left the ship?” I say.

“They have.  I … I got a partial story from the Crown Prince, but I don’t trust his telling, and neither did the Pendari prime minister.  They’ve taken their leave, and we’ll conduct the rest of the negotiations by subspace relay.”

I step closer to Pidge.  “Are you okay enough to go upstairs?”

She nods, and wipes her other eye, and sighs a little.  She looks so tired, but the panic is gone, and it sets my heart at ease, just a little.  “Yeah, I’m okay. We’ll be right there.”

"Thank you," Allura says, and then the screen clicks off.

Pidge turns towards me, and I reach out, setting my hand on her arm; she leans into my touch just a fraction.  "Thank you," she murmurs.

I swallow. "Always."


End file.
